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Feelings Are Friendly If You Let Them Out

Life is never easy. Sometimes you have temporary problems; a blue day; a headache; the flu; someone you can't seem to get along with, n...

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Would You Want Your Child Behind A Chain Link Fence?


Picture by Noma Peet from Pexels.com of a refugee child.




Dannis Cole

Dannis Cole

DanniStories Young Adult Science Fiction on Amazon Kindle
It amazes me how long we as a country have been ignorant of the cruelty perpetrated inside our borders. The first child should never have been separated from a parent who escaped into our country.
Some came without parents but with other kids or an adult or adults. Or they came alone. Before we start arresting or putting people in chain-link enclosures, we should be asking why. Why are these people so desperate to get into our country that they come into a desert with nothing, no minimal preparation? Many die in our deserts. Who in their right mind would do this but someone who faces death in their own country?
Some pay to be smuggled in to seek work. Some are enslaved and their families held hostage back home. Human trafficking brings some migrants in illegally. They are not criminals, but slaves, used for work or prostitution so their slaver makes money.
There are some who know it's illegal but they are desperate for jobs. But the number of actual criminals among this human flood is very low.
We assume that we know so much about these people, who risked death to come to our country. If they are poor, how are they going to know about our policies? They might not have the latest cell phone with Internet. They might not even have a radio. They most likely came from a rural area with no services. None. Think primitive camping. Those that come from more populated areas might be political refugees, or maybe they just made the wrong person mad. There are as many hidden stories among these folks are there are folks.
Here is what the United Nations says about refugees:
"The process of refugee resettlement to the U.S. is a lengthy and thorough process that takes approximately two years and involves numerous U.S. governmental agencies.
"Refugees do not choose the country in which they would like to live. UNHCR, the UN Refugee Agency identifies the most vulnerable refugees for resettlement and then makes recommendations to select countries." From the UNHCR.
Are all of them refugees? According to the International Rescue Committee, "Tens of thousands of children and families from Central America have fled extreme danger—murder, kidnapping, violence against women and forced recruitment by gangs. Those arriving at the U.S. border are being depicted as “illegal immigrants,” but in reality, crossing an international border for asylum is not illegal and an asylum seeker’s case must be heard, according to U.S. and international law." Refugees, Asylum Seekers, Immigrants, and Migrants: What's the Difference?
This article clarifies that an immigrant plans to settle in another country. "Immigrants often go through a lengthy vetting process to immigrate to a new country. Many become lawful permanent residents and eventually citizens.
"A migrant is someone who is moving from place to place (within his or her country or across borders), usually for economic reasons such as seasonal work.
"Many of those crossing the U.S. border from Central American countries—El Salvador, Guatemala, and Honduras—are in fact asylum seekers, not migrants. They have a well-founded fear of persecution if they were to return home.

"Family separation at the border

  • "President Trump signed an executive order on June 20 that does nothing to reunite more than 2,000 children separated from their parents as families seek refuge from persecution or violence in Central America.
  • "The order proposes detaining families for the length of their proceedings—which can often take many months or over a year—despite legal obligations to release children promptly.
  • "The administration is replacing one form of cruelty with another," said Hans Van de Weerd, the IRC's vice president of U.S. programs
  • "Globally there has been a recent surge, with over 300,000 unaccompanied and separated children crossing borders in 80 countries in 2015 and 2016—a five-fold increase from just five years earlier. A small minority have fled to the U.S., arriving at the U.S.-Mexico border after a long journey fraught with shocking levels of abuse and sexual violence. -- from the International Rescue Committee
Now we're putting parents and children in jail. Is that any less traumatic to these poor children? If you have a child or a niece or nephew or any child relative, would you want them put in a cage? Psychologists think these poor children will have dire mental health consequences for years from being in such a situation just a few days. But, the nightmare doesn't end there. See American Psychological Association's article on what the stress is like for an illegal alien's children.
There are many more articles there to support my position. I realize our country can't take in all the refugees, not just Hispanic, but from many other parts of the world. Every industrialized country has a quota of how many refugees it thinks it can absorb. We have cut ours to a third. Is this a Christian thing to do? We are mostly a nation of people who believe in God, and most of us still believe in Jesus Christ. Would Jesus put children in chain link fences or prisons? Would He put refugees in prison before they were charged with a crime? Yes, migrants are here illegally, but that status might change if they were accepted in as legal workers. For the refugee, when your life is in danger, you don't have 5 years to apply to a refugee organization and wait while they come to kill you until your application is approved. I think most of these poor people run first and don't have a clue about the legal process. All they want is escape. For the migrant worker, all they want is a job. Some may want to stay permanently. Then they are immigrants, and they want citizenship. The migrants just want to work and send some money back home while here temporarily. They improve our economy while they work here. We need the workers.
For those who are so adamant about well, these people broke the law and so they deserve... consider that many of them are actually not breaking the law to seek asylum. If murderers were after you, would you think to check with a lawyer first?
And to those who cite moms who broke the law have their children taken away, are those kids put in chain link fences with a mat on the floor? No. Some have relatives to take them. Others go to a warm, hopefully safe foster home with a real bed. To be a foster parent, you must provide a bed for each child, at minimum. Some states have a square footage requirement. See https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubPDFs/homestudyreqs.pdf
Yes, the migrants are breaking the law to come across the border. In this country, last time I looked, a person was innocent until proven guilty.
Most refugees and migrants alike are able and willing to work. Why not give these people our unwanted jobs and put them to work instead of filling our prisons? We should have a system in place for those who cross our borders. Give them some sort of temporary permit so they can legally work. Allow them basic human rights, rights we agreed to in our United Nations. We don't need a wall. We need compassion and understanding. We need workers for our fields, restaurants, and other jobs our native people don't like to do. This isn't taking jobs from our people.
Here's what the National Academy of Sciences had to say about the impact of illegal immigration on our economy:
"The entry of new workers through migration increases the likelihood of filling a vacant position quickly and thus reduces the net cost of posting new offers. The fact that immigrants in each skill category earn less than natives reinforces this effect. Though immigrants compete with natives for these additional jobs, the overall number of new positions employers choose to create is larger than the number of additional entrants to the labor market. The effect is to lower the unemployment rate and to strengthen the bargaining position of workers." Wikipedia has a lot more about the issue, with good references, for the most part.
How many of us are standing in line wanting to harvest fields? The Occupational Outlook Handbook is a government resource that anticipates demand for every job in the country, even though some jobs go by different names. Here's what it says about farm work:
"Smaller farms that sell their products directly to consumers through venues such as farmer’s markets might create some new opportunities for agricultural workers. These direct-to-consumer farms have grown in popularity, and farmers at these operations may hire agricultural workers as an alternative to expensive machinery.
"Job prospects for agricultural workers—especially farmworkers and laborers and agricultural equipment operators—should be very good because workers frequently leave the occupation due to the intense physical nature of the work. [bold added by me]
"Prospects are expected to be best for those who can speak both English and Spanish."
You may argue that people want fast food and restaurant work, as well as service industry work. The Occupational Outlook Handbook says,
"Employment of food preparation and serving related occupations is projected to grow 9 percent from 2016 to 2026, about as fast as the average for all occupations, a gain of about 1.2 million jobs. Population and income growth are expected to result in greater consumer demand for food at a variety of dining places, including restaurants and grocery stores.
Food preparation and serving related occupations is the lowest paid occupational group [bold added], with a median annual wage of $21,910 in May 2017."
Also, the ability to read and fill out the application in good English definitely helps us natives. Did you know that many Hispanic folks coming over the border speak Spanish poorly? They are used to speaking Native Languages like Mayan, Incan, or others that are as diverse as other Native Americans' languages. Did you think that Native American applies only to North America?
You might want to read this NPR story about this family. "Hilda learned Spanish in the U.S., while she and Jayro were in a detention facility. They'd been caught at the border, and they spent nearly a year locked up. Nobody in there spoke Mam.
"She says she was placed with an interpreter she could barely understand.
"She tried talking with her son, but he'd made up his mind to forget that language. She became depressed. So another detainee taught her Spanish." From the article "Wanted: Speakers of Mayan Languages..."
This makes for huge language barriers for all these poor people, and many opportunities for miscommunication and misunderstanding. But the ones who are suffering the most are children. Is anyone listening?

Friday, April 20, 2018

Current Projects April 2018

I am currently getting ready to upload Prude Reads to Kindle. I stopped to update my Web page, which stopped working a couple years ago. I am newly recovered from emergency abdominal surgery which took place in February. Currently, I have been busily editing books and stories. I am splitting my Home Is Series and Rainbow Series, which means I am making each book approximately 250 pages long. They are currently much longer! But, I will leave the old ones up.

My skills with 3D modeling are improving, but I still am having trouble with making modifications to the models in Poser, such as Zheien hands. I am trying to use the free DAZ Studio because it is now better than Poser in the opinion of many top artists who make models on the DAZ website. 

For now, for many of my stories, the generic covers will have to do. I am now learning new versions of DAZ, Poser, and Vue. I use Vue to make the backgrounds. So many venues! My progress is slow. And making characters in Poser, then trying to find the outfits I need for them is difficult.

I have given up on my Access databases which contain my universe. I am trying to rebuild it again so I can refer to it. I have databases for characters, places, healing, and story plots, among others. Now I am having to use reports I made while they worked. In plain English, I have the things I typed in, so the info is there. But I have to rewrite the code to make it easier to find that info when I need it and add to it. Why the switch? Access is part of Microsoft's Office suite but is not included in the package unless you pay extra. A LOT extra! I'm low-income. So I have to stay within the budget. DanniStories needs more readers to be profitable. Right now, it's a labor of love. I am now using LibreOffice instead of OpenOffice, and I like it better. It has more people working on it and OpenOffice is due to expire soon. LibreOffice is built on the same software engine as OpenOffice and is very similar. It is the continuation of the project.

Health problems are interfering with my typing and dry eye syndrome is bothering me constantly, so work is slow in my series. I still have many unpublished stories to upload to Kindle. This hasn't changed, but I had to have cataracts removed last year and couldn't see well enough to write for about a year and a half. So, I am getting back into the groove.

I am trying Amazon's new software to help me format my stories for publication. I was having a great deal of trouble with this in previous years and that's why they haven't been updated since 2013. Once I go through all the old stories, I don't anticipate any problems with them. I know better about the technical side of word processing and how to set up my template for stories. I have been going through all of my stories and formatting them, and correcting formatting. Hopefully, the new routine will get them properly formatted soon.  This is why I am taking so long to update those original 54 stories on Amazon! If you see these problems with Courier New font, font changes in the middle of a story, or underlined words instead of italic, when you read one of my books, please email me at dannistories@gmail.com

See my blog and Twitter for latest updates! I haven't been good about blogging. I will try to post more often. Really.

My plan is to add on-demand printing as I format my books. More about this in the future.

Book Cover Project: Every story now has a cover, whether hand-drawn or modeled with Vue and Poser! My hand-drawn covers look like cartoons. A fellow artist said my Home Is Not Home cover looked like a video game. I don't have the resources to hire actors :) Therefore, the 'video game' look will have to do. All the resources I have are because of my generous sister. Also, I am learning the legalities and niceties of including other talented artist's hard 3D work in my covers. I am now tracking every single piece of freebie clothing I download and who the artist is. I didn't know that when making my cover for Home Is Not Home. I created the Adia figure from DAZ's Victoria 4 figure and made a series of comic renders from my blunders in Poser. I downloaded clothing from various sites, so I am retracing my steps to find the outfit I had Adia wearing. If I had to create this stuff from scratch, I could not do as good of a job on my covers! So, I want to credit all of them so other 3D artists can find their creations. The pose on Home Is Not Home came from Most Digital Creations and I tweaked it a bit. The costume was a spy catsuit and I think it came with Poser. I plan to use the same background [because I love it] but use the new Genesis 8 figures that come with DAZ, except I got the new Victoria 8 for Adia and Michael 8 for Ryonne~. Now if I can just find a plain medium blue jumpsuit for DS uniforms, I will be doing well! I do have lab coats, thanks to artist Wilmap. I will post links soon.

Book Trailer Project  On hold until I can learn how to use video editing software.

Series:   Here are the ones I'm working on, as I can. There are a lot of dovetails, and all of them tie into the Home Is... Series. Every book is standalone, and I include enough of the story from the previous book so the reader can catch up. I advise readers to start with Home Is... and maybe add Rainbow next, then Ishah Secrets, then Domino. There will be other dovetails. But, the reader may start anyplace in any series. The reading order is the way they are numbered, however.

   Home Is... Book 1 is finished but needs a cover. Book 2-4 are  work in progress
   Rainbow   Book 1-3 is a work in progress
   Domino     Book 1 is a work in progress
   Ishah Secrets  Book 1 is a work in progress

Guide To Adia's Universe     I now have the Home Is Companion, free for the asking! No pictures yet, sorry. Write me at dannistories@gmail.com

Artist Training    I am slowly working through tutorials on 3D Modeling so I can make better-looking covers. Lighting is everything!

Current Projects from 2015 [OLD]

Current Projects 2015

This is from my website. Since I am updating it, I've decided not to have a Current Projects page but post my progress on my blog.

Here's the OLD one:

I am currently uploading all of my finished books and stories, and working on covers. This will be ongoing as I write. I hope to keep the pages updated as I go.

My skills with 3D modeling are improving, but I still am having trouble with making modifications to the models in Poser 8, such as Zheien hands. For now, for many of my stories, the generic covers will have to do. I am now learning Poser 9 and Vue 11. I use Vue to make the backgrounds. So many venues! My progress is slow. And making characters in Poser, then trying to find the outfits I need for them is difficult.

I have redone my Access databases which contain my universe. I am trying to get it up and running again so I can refer to it. I have databases for characters, places, healing, and story plots, among others. Now I am having to rebuild my Access databases in Apache OpenOffice's Base. It is similar to Access, but I could not import my queries and forms. In plain English, I have the things I typed in, so the info is there. But I have to rewrite the code to make it easier to find that info when I need it, and add to it. Why the switch? Access is part of Microsoft's Office suite, but is not included with the package unless you pay extra. A LOT extra! I'm low-income. So I have to stay within the budget. DanniStories needs more readers to be profitable. Right now, it's a labor of love. 

Health problems are interfering with my typing and dry eye syndrome is bothering me constantly, so work is slow on my series. I still have many unpublished stories to upload to Kindle. 

Formatting these stories is a real pain! The normal procedures that Amazon recommends have not worked for me to remove old formatting from many versions of  Word. Once I go through all the old stories, I don't anticipate any problems with them. I know better about the technical side of word processing and how to set up my template for stories. It is a mystery to me why, when I have my font set for Georgia font, after I strip my file to vanilla print and upload to Kindle, augh! I see Courier New font, which I once used, and underlines instead of italics. This is how I was supposed to set up my manuscripts for submission to publishers. Right now, I can't see the old formatting when I bring up the file in OpenOffice, nor could I see it in Word. If I can't see it, I can't get rid of it. In plain English, I will have to go through my 500-plus page book and change every underline to italic. Repeat that for every one of my books, novels, novellas, novelettes and short stories. This is why I am taking so long to update those original 54 stories on Amazon! If you see these problems when you read one of my books, please email me at dannistories@gmail.com

See my blog and Twitter for latest updates! Posterous closed their site and I haven't been good about blogging. I will try to be more diligent on Twitter.

My plan is to add on-demand printing as I format my books. More about this in the future.

Book Cover Project: I want every story to have a cover, whether hand drawn or modeled with Vue 7 and Poser 8. Now using Vue 11 amd Poser 9. Maybe I should just say Vue and Poser! My hand-drawn covers look like cartoons. A fellow artist said my Home Is Not Home cover looked like a video game. I don't have the resources to hire actors :) Therefore, the 'video game' look will have to do. All the resources I have are because of my generous sister. Also, I am learning the legalities and niceties of including other talented artist's hard 3D work in my covers. I am now tracking every single piece of freebie clothing I download and who the artist is. I didn't know that when making my cover for Home Is Not Home. I created the Adia figure from DAZ's Victoria 4 figure, and made a series of comic renders from my blunders in Poser. I downloaded clothing from various sites, so I am retracing my steps to find the outfit I had Adia wearing. If I had to create this stuff from scratch, I could not do as good of a job on my covers! So, I want to credit all of them so other 3D artists can find their creations.

Book Trailer Project  Currently working on an animated trailer for Home Is series. I have the first few seconds of video for it. I am not sure of the legalities of posting it, the consequences of posting parts before the whole. I am doing a lot of Internet research to avoid common mistakes when moving from mere print to book covers and book trailers! My book trailers with me playing and singing are not that interesting. I am having to plan a trailer that I can narrate, because I don't have anyone else to do it for me :)

Series:   Here are the ones I'm working on, as I can. There are a lot of dovetails, and all of them tie into the Home Is... Series. Every book is standalone, and I include enough of the story from the previous book so the reader can catch up. I advise readers to start with Home Is... and maybe add Rainbow next, then Ishah Secrets, then Domino. There will be other dovetails. But, the reader may start anyplace in any series. The reading order is the way they are numbered, however.

   Home Is... Book 14 is a work in progress
   Rainbow   Book 3 is a work in progress
   Domino     Book 2 is a work in progress
   Ishah Secrets  Book 2 is a work in progress

Guide To Adia's Universe     This will be a guide to races, worlds, and stories with maps and artwork but I am still in the planning stages.

Artist Training    I am slowly working through tutorials on 3D Modeling so i can make better looking covers.

Software Used Currently    
[Note: I have no connection with any of these folks except to use their products! I highly recommend all of them to all.]

Vue is a software to help me create beautiful skies, mountains, fields, and cities! 
E-on Software makes Vue, which many film companies use for scenes they can't do in New Zealand, etc. You have probably seen many movies that incorporated scenes from it.
Interested in learning 3D? You can download a free copy of Vue to play with here!

There are a lot of great sites out there to download 3D content [people, clothes, props, and sets]. I use the recommended sites from Vue and Poser. Vue's artist community is 3D Cornucopia, and there are links right in the software to purchase and download 3D models. Everything you download is covered under one license at Cornucopia 3D:


Poser is where I create my characters, though I am playing with MakeHuman
Smith-Micro Software creates Poser. You start with a male or female figure, change the face to your liking, put clothes on it, add props, and create a picture [You render it, which makes a picture you can print or display on your computer screen]. The actual process can seem daunting at first, but there is a well-written manual to teach you how to use it. If you don't like to read manuals, there are so many tutorials out there, it makes it easier to learn! Oh, what you can do with this! I am not good enough at drawing and painting to create what I see in my mind. This software, and Vue, makes me able to visualize what's in my mind, which is awesome!!

Poser's artist community is Content Paradise, and there is a ReadMe file with every model downloaded to explain what you can and can't do with this model, from the artist. If there is no ReadMe file, don't use the model in a commercial render or post a render including it to the Internet, without contacting the artist. The ReadMe should explain the legal terms for using the item.


A good starting place for tutorials is to subscribe to the Content Paradise channel on YouTube:



MakeHuman  This is an open-source, free software to create 3D peopleWith MakeHuman, I could make figures to sell; Poser figures are just for creating people for book covers, or to be used with the Poser software.
You can find MakeHuman here:
 It is a free software, a product of love from volunteers. They exist through donations. MakeHuman is a lot of fun to play with!

Blender is an open-source, free software to create a 3D model from scratch, layer by layer.

 Open-source means it is in the public domain, maybe with certain limitations. A program has source code, or source, as the programmers say. Open-source means anyone can copy it, add to it, and re-release it, as a free product. SourceForge is a great resource for free software.

Legal Stuff and You If you just want to print it out and hang it on your wall, you don't have to worry about this stuff. But, if it's going outside your home [on your blog, emailing to friends, etc] it's a good idea to wait and check the ReadMe or license info on the site you downloaded a 3D model from, first. If it goes viral, you might get sued for plagiarism, which is claiming someone else's work as yours. There's a lot of good info on Copyright.gov on what plagiarism is, and isn't. Look up Fair Rights here:


   As an author, I check this site whenever I have a legal question. Any prospective writer should check it out. If you have a manuscript that you want to publish yourself, I strongly recommend you take the trouble to copyright your work with Library of Congress. It is true that the moment you write something, you have legal rights to it under the law. But, if you are serious about publishing it yourself, you must be serious about protecting your work. If you plan to submit it to a publisher, keep a copy, and any revisions you do on it, ever. I've been able to prove my stuff to Amazon by submitting all those revisions. 

Word-Processing Software  I use OpenOffice for my writing. It is open-source and free, but sponsored by Oracle, which is a huge software company for big computers. They produce Java, which is on just about every device you have. So, I figured it would be good. It is! OpenOffice includes Base, a database program. I can't keep track of my writing universe without a database. My memory isn't good. You can get your very own copy here:


You can find out more about Microsoft Word, and the Office suite here:

Beware of other sites that advertise free Microsoft products; this software is so famous, there are bogus copies of it floating around. Every copy must have a valid code, and an internet connection to verify it. You don't want to buy a copy only to find your code doesn't work.

If a publisher accepts your work for print, you should be covered without going through Library of Congress. The publisher will get an ISBN number for you. This is the number assigned to your book so bookstores can distinguish your book from other books that might have the same title. It is expensive to buy your own ISBN number, but if you use a print on demand service, you can use the one they assign. It just won't have whatever name your Indie publishing house uses on it.

 I use CreateSpace to print my print books and make them available through Amazon, but there are others out there. I use Lulu for my hardcovers, because CreateSpace doesn't offer the format for huge books like mine. Personally, I love CreateSpace! I don't use their editing services because I feel I can edit my own books, but the services are available, for a fee. It didn't cost much to get started because I skipped most of the services except just to submit an already formatted file, use my created picture, and their nice cover making software to make my book available when someone clicks the button for that print copy of Home Is Not Home. They check my files for errors before they publish it. I love the quality of the finished book!


My experience with Lulu was good, but no hardcovers of my book sold yet so I can't comment on how they were with customers. The proof copy I received was library quality and beautiful! Paper is becoming more expensive, so the cost of one hardcover is probably a great deterrent to my possible readers! Most of that price is what goes to Lulu. Ditto CreateSpace.


For e-publishing your book, I use Kindle, Amazon's electronic bookshelf. You don't have to own a Kindle to publish Kindles! Kindle software is free to everyone, so if you have a computer, you can read Kindle books. There are many, many free ones [public domain books]. They even have a downloadable free guide on how to get started. Please, follow their instructions on how to set up your copy of Word!! Formatting is very important. If you don't have Word, you can download a free copy of OpenOffice.

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Feelings Are Friendly If You Let Them Out

Life is never easy. Sometimes you have temporary problems; a blue day; a headache; the flu; someone you can't seem to get along with, no matter how hard you try. Some challenges are permanent. You become disabled. You lose a loved one. You survive a natural disaster. Anything that changes you drastically. How do you go on? Life isn't the same anymore.

But, no matter what the challenge, life is a happy thing. That's why I created DanniStories. My characters go through a lot, but one thing's for sure: They learn that no matter what, they can learn to enjoy life with its new limits.

I try to choose major life changes to write about. I've lived through some of them. I've had good friends who had others. Or, I've read the stories of people who lived the rest. Grief, tragic happenings, loss. They aren't easy.

What is happiness worth to a person? Lifestyle changes? Effort to accept what one cannot change? Learning to emphasize the "Can List" instead of the "Can't  List"?

Only you can decide how to overcome your difficulties and reach for the happiness. It's there. It's real. And, it's doable! Never give up on happiness.

The first step to happiness is let yourself grieve whatever isn't there anymore. Crying isn't happiness, but true happiness is the difference between sorrow and happiness. Without your trials, you couldn't know happiness. Everything would feel the same.

The second step to happiness is let yourself feel what you feel at the moment. Sad? Don't fight it. Don't give in to it, either. If you feel so devastatingly unhappy that you want to leave this life, GET HELP NOW. Call that number inside your phone book or look up Suicide Help Line online. Talk to that person on the other end of that phone call and let them help you. Or, call a close friend or relative who understands.

Quit pretending to be happy when you're not. Learn to recognize and express your feelings in constructive ways.

Angry? It's okay to say, I'm angry! Grrrrr! It's okay to warn folks close to you, "I'm feeling angry right now. It's not you. I'm just giving you a little warning that I might be grouchy, so I don't hurt your feelings." It's okay to pound your pillow, or pretend that the object of your anger is in a nearby chair and tell it off! It's okay to write an angry letter, then tear it up. It's okay to paint an angry picture or create an angry sculpture. Art and music are great ways to express feelings. If you express them while they are small [or smaller than they would be], they are easier to express. If you wait until anger consumes you, or hold it all in until you become your own personal volcano erupting all over your loved ones, that's not okay! Express it as it comes, and you can use the energy to do something creative or constructive. Clean your room or your house!

Anger turned inwards becomes deep sadness or depression. In effect, you punish yourself for daring to feel angry. This is only one cause for depression, but it's a big one.

Feeling afraid? Fear, worry, and self-doubt can be paralyzing. Try to learn about whatever it is that scares you. I am terrified of wasps, so I learned a little about them and their ant cousins. I learned not to fear bees [but not killer bees] because honey bees are not aggressive and they are vegetarians. Fear of failure can be a big problem because humans learn from their mistakes. If we never made a mistake, we couldn't learn how not to repeat that particular mistake, now would we? Allow yourself to make mistakes. Fight self-doubt by remembering things you did or do well. Let yourself fear, but don't let fear stop you from doing what you need to do. What's the worst thing that could happen if what you fear, happens? If it's not illegal or immoral, such as asking for a raise, a date, or help with a task, try taking a small step towards doing it. Make small talk with your boss. Open a door for the lady, or let him open the door for you. Tell someone that you're having trouble doing whatever it is that you need help doing, and see if someone offers to help.

Sadness, that's a tough emotion. No one seems to understand it. But, you can help them understand it. It's okay to say, "I'm feeling sad right now, because" whatever you're sad about. Maybe someone said something that hurt. Maybe you're missing a person or pet who died or has gone. Maybe you're feeling blue and you don't know why. But, if you tell someone, you're not alone with it now.

There are many other emotions, but they often lead to these three, if they are uncomfortable. Expressing them can help a lot, maybe more than you think if you do this on a regular basis.